Artistic Anarchy

When I grow up, I'll go down the river to the Singing Sea

Why Simon Borg is Wrong (Again): USMNT Heads to Seattle

by johndsykes86

Soccer....Family Style

As a woman who follows soccer, I’ll never pass up an opportunity to correct Simon Borg, so when one of my friends posted a link to his blog defending Seattle’s US Soccer ticket sales, I had to comment. We can agree on one thing: it ain’t over til it’s over, and people need to see what Seattle pulls off Tuesday night before passing judgement. But that’s where it ends.

Here in Seattle, the biggest reasons I’ve heard about why people aren’t going to the game are 1. It’s a Tuesday night, and 2. The $50 ticket is too expensive. I’d like to reframe these: What else do you have going on on a Tuesday that’s more important than the first qualifier to come to Seattle since the 1970s? It’s not like you have a big weekend full of things…it’s a Tuesday, and it’s early enough you won’t even need an…

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The 8 Different Ways to Write Poetry

by johndsykes86

Source of original post

The 8 Different Ways to Write Poetry

1. Drag a pen across paper, cutting into the pages and staining the corners with tear marks. Breathe hot, alcohol-scented, breaths into the pages as you internalise your screams. Handle it as though it were poison. Slide it between the leaves of an old dusty book when you wake up, don’t read it again. 

2. Feel it in the swell of your chest on good days when the Sun shines and you can hear children laughing. Recognise it in the sounds of the birds singing when you wake early in the mornings and see it curled in the steam from your morning coffee. Intangible, but perfect.

3. Regiment your stanza lengths. Regiment your rhyme schemes. Keep your message simple because that is what your school teacher taught you for an A. Read it back and find no trace of yourself in the printed letters. Leave it on your desk and contemplate a world in which these words are not the ones which would get you wide recognition. 

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#485: Settling the Chaos Muppet within

by johndsykes86

I know the feeling. My life seems like a constant stream of horrible mistakes and actually had been accused of the very same thing in a similar circumstance. Luckily, my friends aren’t as hard as this scenario. It helps immensely to have good people on your side and I’m lucky to have a lot of them now.

Captain Awkward

Before diving into today’s letter, I wanted to put out there that people have requested an update from LW #354. While there is never an obligation to respond once your letter is answered here, if you are comfortable with it people would like to know: Are you okay? Can you pee on the regular now? You haunt our dreams.

Now, today’s letter:

Hi there, CA!

I’ve been getting a lot of feedback lately, from people I trust, that I’m a Chaos Muppet. I’m one of those people who weird things happen to: Things break when I’m around, weird accidents happen, things are lost.

I’m using the passive voice because, when I analyze how things went wrong, I realize that I didn’t *overtly* break that thing, or cause the accident or lose someone’s this-or-that. But because people see me as chaotic, I tend to get blamed first and apologized to…

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Chain Gang

by johndsykes86

Someone on twitter posted an article for young writers about not making it as a writer. While not a direct response to that post, it was an interesting parallel to my own struggles with career choices in the last week. So naturally I wrote about it.

I found myself coming to at 10am on Thursday, finding myself deciphering patterns in drywall ceilings and already clocked in and on a call that seemed to drone on longer than the 5 minutes registered on my phone. Somehow, I am fully dressed and cognitive enough to explain the difference between terminal services and VPN. The person on the other side of the line is as perplexed about the the answer given as I am disinterested in giving it.

Somehow, through Job-like patience or actual understanding of the resolution given, I find myself off the call. My notes done, hands already moving to pick up the next call in a infinite stream of the sort soul-crushing defeat that can only come with customer-facing phone support can bring, I find myself 3 minutes later staring at the notes before hitting save, end call, ready. I obviously can not be awake because I’m reading something that should definitely not be in the notes.

“What the fuck am I doing here?”

Existential questions about the path you chose in life usually aren’t a part of the job description. But there it was was. The question I had begin to ask myself in earnest with really knowing now appeared unbidden and frankly unwanted in digital form…

With my brain racking every possible excuse that I could conjure up with upward mobility and career paths bought and paid for with that imaginary currency of seniority, I realized with that same soul-crushing weight that usually comes free with my many support cases that I simply didn’t have an answer.

The next couple of days were spent soul searching in my room, a sort of forensic investigation of where my goals didn’t reach reality and piecing together where it all went horribly so horribly wrong.

Let’s step aside and be realistic for second so I don’t come off like some woe-is-me chump, I have a job, a roof over my head, and on occasion…discretionary funds and a lot of people aren’t as lucky.

It was no surprise that I had more questions than answers after racking my brain several hours for multiple days. It was only on a walk to 7-11 that things got a bit more clearer. I didn’t really want to climb a corporate ladder or become a career student, stuck in a cycle of debt avoidance. I simply wanted to do all the things except the one I was doing for a living. I do something now that I love to a certain extent but not something that’s a passion. It was something to pay the bills and debt, which was going nowhere despite my efforts. For every vacation, I had some new low to look forward to when coming back.

I had became, at 27, the thing I said I wouldn’t be at 16-17 seeing so many of the parents at the daycare I worked for tired and unhappy and passing that to their kids

I wasn’t enjoying work. I was becoming work.

The things I wanted to do as a career were replaced with something I could suffer and toil away at and not risk not being there for my mom and family. Admirable at the time, but 5 years after and now 3k miles always from said family, that decision was the source of my strife.

So now what? Hell if I know. Going back to school seems great, exciting even. Learning to program in something other than Basic and HTML would be a worthwhile challenge. Writing more, even if it isn’t for money, isn’t that bad of a thing either.

I just don’t want to look at this entry written a different way in 3 years. I just don’t. I would have failed myself in the biggest way if I find myself repeating these words.

So where to begin?


PS: if you’re looking for someone to write his ass off about something and you’re willing to pay me all of the monies, please don’t let my previous statement prevent me from parting with your cash.

The Blueprint for Non League Football – Just who runs the leagues anyway?

by johndsykes86

Always was interested in how England’s non-league teams were ran. @theballisround has the scoop.

The Ball is Round

Today’s lesson in how to keep our grass roots game alive comes from one of Non Leagues most respected coaches, Hugo Langton.

So another non league football season has drawn to a close. I can safely say the last few months has been very tough due to a ridiculous fixture congestion. I joined the management team at Hastings United in February on the back of their outstanding FA Cup run.

Every year the Ball is Round ask me what I would like to change about non league football. Well this year I would like common sense to be introduced by those who run the leagues. Let me explain why…

Hugo-Langton3When I joined Hastings United in February, the club still incredibly had over half of their league games to play. The weather this year has been awful too, and so there were long periods when no one could play games…

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What’s the angle?

by johndsykes86

“And I pray to God that one day, He will grant me the power to reach out and hold my hand over your head and give you instant belief, ’cause you don’t have instant belief. You’ve been hooked, you’ve been crooked, you’ve been lied to so many times, that you’re suspicious-minded. And when the right thing comes along, you don’t believe in it. When I’m coming in knocking on the front door, you’re out the back door looking for four leaf clovers. And when you find it, you think somebody planted it there to fool you. ‘Whats the angle?’ You look for an excuse. In this modern day and age we have instant coffee and instant tea–instant disbelief. Thats the reason we will never become anything–it is because we will never believe in ourselves. We will always listen to the mass majority. If everybody’s making fun of you and criticizing you, then you know you’re on the right track. Cause most people ain’t got it.”

Glenn W. Turner from the speech “Instant Disbelief’ and as heard on the Death Cab for Cutie track “Amputations”

Why the Des Moines Menace Represent Everything That is Right with Soccer in America.

by johndsykes86

A great article on the Des Moines Menace…

Soccer....Family Style

Last night, when I read Chris Cuellar‘s Des Moines Register article about today’s Menace vs Sporting KC Open Cup match, I was pretty clear in my feelings that it did not reflect the magnitude of the day, nor a proper “so you’re saying we have a chance” feeling. Sure, he’s a journalist, but we could sound a tiny bit more excited at the possibility of a win for the Menace tonight, because however unlikely, it is a wonderful possibility. I wrote my thoughts about the game here on my blog, and left a comment on the Register’s website and left it at that. But then you wonderful people started sending me other things people wrote about our Menace, and one piece I must share here, because it’s wonderful, and what I wish I’d written about our guys. So thank you, Jason Lemire, Freelance Soccer Writer (310.867.0977  ~   lemire.jason at…

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Life is…

by johndsykes86

Image

Football finally came home – Top that Pep

by johndsykes86

The Ball is Round

“Football is a religion in Dortmund. Bayern may have won a lot of fans and a lot of trophies because of the incredible number of good decisions they have made, but now there is another story. Along has come another club that is pretty good as well.” It’s hard to disagree with the words of Jürgen Klopp, the miracle worker behind the spectacular rise from the ashes of bankruptcy of Borussia Dortmund. Despite enduring a disappointing domestic season where Bayern had simply been too good for them and the rest of German football, Dortmund arrived en masse in London knowing that all of the pain could be erased in one ninety minute game.

20130526-214507.jpgLondon awoke on Saturday morning awash with yellow and black. Whilst 478,567, to be precise, Dortmund fans had been unlucky in trying to secure one of the 24,000 official tickets for the Wembley showpiece, tens of thousands…

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Roadtrippin’ 5

by johndsykes86

image

My thought as I take this photo? I am going to die in this cab and not even leave a beautiful corpse.